Oats

One day lad...all this will be houses

You can’t get simpler than oats.

Oats are so versatile and healthy. Grab yourself a bag of oats, roll them with a roller or what ever, add hot milk or water, season to taste.

Simple.

Porridge.

The food of the Gods.

There was a time when oats weren’t so trendy. You could stand in shops looking for the oats and would often have difficulty locating something oaty. Nowadays, oats are trendy. They are healthy. Their benefits extolled far and wide.

When I was a kid we had Ready Brek. All that was, was oats. A box of oats.

These are Scott's? Does he know?

My nan had Scots Porridge oats. The difference? Negligible. Perhaps only just the packaging.

Nip down your shop now and you’ll see the shelves burgeoning under the weight of oaty breakfast cereals. Instant oats, bags of rolled oats, crunchy honey coated oat clusters, oaty hoops and more oats than you can shake a stick at. But rewind a little.

INSTANT OATS.

How more instant can you get than a hand full of oats heated in milk or water in a pan or microwave? Not really more instant than that. And yet, the consumer is offered a variety of other oat brands. Quaker, Kelloggs, Ready Brek. All sell individual sachets of oats. Each box of sachets contain about 5 servings. Each box costs the consumer upwards of £2.

But wait! How confoundedly stupid of the consumer. Surely the big bag of rolled oats for 50p on the bottom shelf there….surely that’s just add milk and heat…surely? Well obviously not. Because tonight, dear reader, my horror at the stupidity of the consumer, the easily led, the simply hoodwinked, for lo! Behold! COW AND GATE do a porridge ESPECIALLY FOR BABIES! Why? What’s wrong with a good handful of oats? Nothing!

There are people out there who buy this stuff in good faith. Thinking that by spending the extra money they are some how making themselves better, socially, maybe even healthwise.

Utter shit blobs.

OATS IS OATS. You don’t need to add anything. You need not even use milk to make your porridge. Oats. Plain simple common garden oats. Get yours here.

Instant pancake mix

Just add milk and egg

Honestly I was so angry at the advert that it rivalled the stupidity of the INSTANT PANCAKE MIX (just add milk and egg) I observed in a shop once*. Some people shouldn’t be allowed out with money…….

Anyway, doing a bit of research on the various porridge products on the market I thought I’d check the ingredients of a variety of oat based breakfast cereals. Now, you’d think porridge was just oats. If I asked for porridge, that’s what I’d hope to get. And yet……

Ready BrekContains Wholegrain Rolled Oats (60%), Wholegrain Oat Flour, Calcium, Niacin, Iron, Pantothenic Acid (B5), Vitamin B6, Riboflavin (B2), Thiamin (B1), Folic Acid, Vitamin B12.

Quaker PorridgeContains 100% Oats.

Quaker Oat So SimpleContains Quaker Rolled Oats, Stabiliser: Lecithin (soya)

Scots Porage Oats were apparently bought out by Quaker. I am unable to find any links to that. So yes…With the exception of Quaker Porridge Oats which claim to be 100% rolled oats, the others reveal some interesting points of note. Ready Brek is only 60% rolled oats with the rest bulked out by flour and additives. I imagine the flour is for the consistency and to make the cereal more palatable to children.

Why “instant” oats (Oats So Simple) need soya based stabiliser and standard oats don’t I have no idea. Could it be that the microwave does things to your oats they’d rather you not know about? I have no idea. Still, it’s very interesting. To me at least. Incidentally, did you know that Pepsico own Quaker? Well now you do.


* – For those less in tune with me here, the instant pancake mix was just plain ordinary flour.

2 Comments

Filed under food, Oats

2 Responses to Oats

  1. Pixie

    Okay, hit the wrong button there :oP
    I agree with you – I used to just buy bog standard Tesco porridge oats, which are just as good as all the others (except organic ones…but frankly much as I agree with the concept of organics, the bumped up prices do piss me off so I tend to stick to as much organic fruit and veg as possible and just get normal everything else).

    I have to confess to a Quaker Oat so Simple habit on occasion though – the odd thing is that I still cook them in the pan as normal, it’s the added golden syrup / cinnamon / sugary flavour that gets me. Damn sweet tooth!

    • stegzy

      Oats don’t necessarily need to be organic. The addition of unnecessary ingredients in a product as simple as oats is bewildering. Even the Oat so Simple stuff, yes I understand that some degree of processing may be required to make them “water instant” as opposed to “milk instant”, but I think even then, surely the only addition should be water soluble milk powder as opposed to half a chemistry set.